Saturday morning and I had just walked in after doing my newspaper rounds. I heard the sound of my brother gasping in a really orgasmic way. Maybe if he was masturbating I could get to give another blowjob to him! I went to find him on his bed, but not how I ever thought I’d catch him. Just like last time there was someone else with him. And just like last time my heart shattered at the sight; but a lot, lot harder. It was a girl who was with him. He had his face buried in her upturned skirt, and he was groaning madly as if he was enjoying it more than anything. Worse still I was so quiet they didn’t notice me at first, and I had to endure seeing my brother taking pleasure from a girl.

Tears were welling up in my eyes by the time they both noticed. Not only had the love of my life cheated on me, but now he was cheating on his boyfriend. I thought I could look up to my twin as a role model. But now he’s a cheater, and he’s turning away from me. Scott couldn’t offer me to join in now; he saw the pain he caused in me. I simply couldn’t believe it. My life had shattered right in front of my eyes…

I ran out of the room.
“Jamie, wait!” Scott came after me. I tried to fight him off, shrugging away his hand while all the time trying to hide my tears. He tried desperately to grab me, but I wouldn’t let him. Nothing he could ever say would help. Eventually it got to the point where I had to give him a huge shove away from me, screaming, and then collapsed on the sofa. Head buried in a cushion, I gave up forcing back the tears and let them be soaked up by the fabric. I didn’t expect Scott to sit by me and stroke my head. But then it’s so like him, he’d never just let me suffer.
“Jamie, I…”
“Just go away…”
“Jamie, let me explain!”
“You don’t need to, just go”
“Look, I just wanted to find out…you know what it’s like with a girl…”
“I guessed”
“I didn’t want it to end like this!”
“Oh I’m sorry for barging in then!”
“No! I meant I didn’t want it to get in the way of us”
“What do you mean us? We’re nothing now! You’ve ruined everything! First Declan, now this”
“I know I’m…I’m sorry…”
“If you wanted to find out so badly, could you have at least done it somewhere else?”
“Well, it was the only time one of us was home alone”
“I don’t believe it…”
“What?”
“I used to look up to you! I used to think you were perfect in every way, you couldn’t ever do anything wrong! I loved you so much! But now my idol’s a dirty slut…”
“Jamie…”
“Just leave me alone!”
“Jamie, please I didn’t realise…”
“Didn’t realise what, that you’d get caught?”
“No, I didn’t realise that…”
“What?”
“I didn’t realise that you loved me…”
“Oh…”
“And I guess if you really do…”
“Yes, of course I do!”
“Well then, I guess I…”
“Yes…”
“Jamie, I…”
“Scott?” The girl emerged from the bedroom. I buried my face back in the sofa again. I couldn’t look at the filthy thing that had taken my brother.
“Yes, Alicia?”
“What’s wrong?”
“Well I…”
“What’s Jamie doing here?”
“He lives here!”
“What’s wrong with him?”
“It’s a long story…”
“Well come on then! We’ve got things to finish!” At this I turned back round to look at my brother. I could feel floods of tears in my eyes, and he could see them. Can my brother ever make it up to me? Please, I just wanted him to see it so badly in my eyes that I couldn’t live without him.
“Erm, well Alicia… You see…”
“What? What’re you waiting for? You really were amazing just then!”
“But, Jamie?”
“Your brother won’t mind, he’s probably heard it all before anyway!” She took hold of his hand, trying to lead him away from me. Now Scott had to make his choice. I stared as hard as I could into him, just willing him to stay here. Now I could see it in his eyes, the pain of a choice. But surely there’s nothing in the choice?
“I guess…” was what he said when he left for the bedroom again. I couldn’t believe it. For the second time, my heart smashed further. I was abandoned, completely. He’d chosen a girl over me. A dirty, horrible, filthy…
“I HATE YOU!! I WISH YOU NEVER LIVED!!!” I ran out of the door and onto the street.

I only returned when it was dark. I’d spent most of that day moping around the streets, trying vaguely not to go into a fit of tears. I didn’t eat as I had no money, I didn’t do anything as I felt awful, I didn’t see anyone as everyone ignored me. I only decided to retreat back home once it got unbearably dark and cold. Unsurprisingly, once I got home I got no flood of worry or attention from my fake parents or my brother; although there were two big factors. My fake parents were watching Eastenders, which is unmissable apparently; and my brother wasn’t actually there. I was worried:
“Where’s Scott?”
“How should we know? We’ve been out all day!”
“Didn’t he leave a note or something?”
“No, now do you have to keep talking? We’re busy!”
And again, my heart crumbled. He wasn’t home, then where was he? He’s either lost or run away or…at someone else’s…
I darted into the bedroom. Empty, very empty. I cried out in despair. My brother, who’s broken my heart twice already, is now sleeping in someone else’s bed. I cried so much that night. No-one had missed me going, Scott had even reacted to my depression, and he probably didn’t even care now he’s got someone else. I may as well be dead. It took some great will power to not jump from the window that night. The room felt so empty, I didn’t care that he’d broken me, I just wanted him here. I just wanted him to stay forever and never leave.

“So…yeah, that’s about it”
“Well Jamie, it certainly sounds like you’ve been through a lot!”
“I know, but can you help Dr. Sanderson?”
“I think I can, but it mostly comes down to you”
“I’ll do anything, as long as I can be happy!”
“Well, from what you’ve told me, I get the idea that you perhaps, don’t know Scott that well”
“What?”
“Well I mean you’ve only spoken of the facts that you were close, but maybe you have conflicting personalities!”
“But if we’re so close, how can we be conflicting?”
“Well, I just feel that maybe you are trying too hard to keep Scott, when he may feel that he wants to; fly the nest if you like”
“You mean I’m clingy?”
“Well…yes. There’s also the possibility that Scott feels uncomfortable with your closeness. As after all, it’s not strictly…of the norm if you will”
“But I can’t…”
“Live without him, yes you said…”
“But I can’t! I don’t know anyone who can possibly make me feel so happy!”
“Well maybe you can go out into the world and find someone!”
“I’ve been! There isn’t anyone!”
“Then maybe it’s your closed mind that is denying you of your happiness”
“What? But I…”
“Look, Jamie. One day, you’re going to have to move on”
“But I don’t want to!”
“Then I wish you good luck in life”
“Oh, you’ll never know! No-one will ever know!”
“Jamie, come back!”
“Take your stupid money, thanks for nothing!”

Now what? The stupid psychiatrist didn’t help, and if he can’t help, no-one can. I’m alone. No-one knows. No-one will ever know how close I am to my brother. I’ve got nothing left. What’s the point in me now? I’ll never be happy, nothing worth living for, parents who hate me, brother who betrayed me, no friends, no prospects, nothing. What’s the point? I’d best just go home and end it…

Oh please Scott, come back! It’s getting dark and I need you here with me! I haven’t seen you in days, where can you be? Please tell me you haven’t moved in with someone else… You can’t have left me here alone with the monsters! You can’t have! I’d never cope without you to protect me! Please Scott… Come home, to bed, to me!

What’s the time now? 11?! Oh God… I can’t do it… He’s not coming back is he? He’s left. Oh God… I really can’t take it… I’m going to the window. Look at it, it’s awful this world! Hideous tower blocks, lumps of concrete, all filled with hideous creatures like my fake parents. It’s worth leaving behind. But down there, God it’s so high! It’s a long way down 8 floors… Oh God, surely I can’t…

But Scott, what’s he put me through? He’s left me for two complete strangers and he doesn’t even care that I’m here, crying my eyes out every night for him. I can’t live without him; no-one can take him away from me! Why can’t he come home, warm and safe with me? Not out there in that hideous world!

Oh but he’s torn me apart! I could never live with the grief he’s given me now! We’d never be the same. We’d just always be nothing! Maybe the Doctor was right; I need to move on… He just doesn’t want me anymore. I’m just his trash now, discarded and left to rot… But I can’t go on, he’s just perfect. Why did he have to do this?

Well, here we go legs outside. God it’s cold. Maybe I should put better clothes on. Nah, it’ll only leave more things to clear up. Oh God, I can’t believe it’s come to this… But what else left do I have? Nothing; I’ve just got death left to help me. Why this? Why? If only there was some other way! Ah well, too late now. Maybe Scott will realise eventually how much he meant to me after this. Right…OK then… on 3, or 5? No 3, better not waste time. Well…here I go…

1…
2…
Oh, bloody wind! I’ll end up next door if it carries on!

OK, OK; now?
1…
2…
Wait, someone’s walking below… There, that’s better

Right, now for sure…
1…
“JAMIE, FOR GOD’S SAKE GET DOWN!” Oh my God it’s Scott!
“Scott! You came back!” Scott wrestled his brother down to his bed
“What were you doing?”
“I…I…”
“You were going to jump?!”
“Well…”
“But why?”
“Because I’ve got nothing left, that’s why! You left me last night, the doctor says I’m clingy and I love you so much!”
“Oh Jamie…I’m really sorry. I can’t say how sorry I am!”
“It’s OK I’m just glad you’re back!”They hugged tight. It took a long time for Jamie to let go. He was just amazed Scott was back.
“Jamie, really, I can’t begin to say how sorry I am. I really didn’t enjoy the past few days.”
“Oh Scott, please just stay here with me, never go again!”
“Only if you promise not to jump!”
“Promise”
“Then Jamie, I can finally say to you here and now, that I really do love you”
“Really?”
“All those times I’ve looked out for you, been there for you, and stayed with you I’ve always done it from the bottom of my heart. I’d never want to see you fall! I never wanted to hurt you! And those times with the others, they never meant anything! Nothing at all! At least nothing compared to how much I adore you!”
Tears welled up in Jamie’s eyes “So you never wanted to fly the nest then?”
“No! You’d never cope here on your own! I’d hate myself forever if I did!”
“So this doesn’t freak you out then…”
“Of course not! I love you! That’s all that matters!”
“That’s all that matters… Oh Scott, I don’t know what to say…”
“Don’t say anything then…”

The two brothers kissed for the first time in what felt like an eternity for Jamie. He reacquainted himself with the sweet taste of Scott’s smooth lips, pressing lightly and dancing with his own. The time spent waiting for this moment just made it taste even better. How much had Jamie wanted this? His life came flooding back to him. Feeling and emotion filled him up and he returned the passionate favour with all the hyperactivity as if it were his first. His hands moved quickly over Scott’s pulsing body and his tongue was in a long dance with its partner.

Scott had sensed his brother’s fulfilment and responded. He unzipped his jacket and let his brother pull off the cloth cover to his shaking body. He knew how much Jamie liked the sight of him topless. The touch of Jamie’s cold hands against his chest almost brought tears to his eyes. Whether it was because he knew he was finally pleasing him again, or he felt the bond being resealed between them, he didn’t know.

He knew he was cold, but he didn’t care. Jamie loved feeling his brother’s amazing body; he loved it even more when he made him squirm at his cold hands. His fingers rippled along every bump on his torso, the huge chest, the toned waist, he loved it all! Scott gasped at how cold his hands were, but he stayed firmly in place: lying on top of his older twin, just where he wanted. Soon the hands went to explore further…

His tracksuit trousers were being invaded. Scott couldn’t help but groan at the innocent yet firm grasp Jamie just made. But how could he blame him? It was his fault Jamie’s heart had broken. He needed to face the consequences like a man! And how could he love him any less for doing so? He flipped them both over so now he was underneath, and Jamie was free to perform the final punishment.

Pulling down Scott’s unusually soggy joggers, Jamie freed the thing that he’d so badly wanted for far too long now. It was better than he remembered, so he gave it a warm and full embrace. No sooner had it been caged within Scott’s boxers had it be trapped deep in the mouth of the heartbroken twin. The taste was so good; time had made it mature like wine! He never thought he’d taste anything as good as this again in his life. He thought the kiss was great to wait for; this was just in a completely different league! But he had to make Scott know what he had been missing; he had to make him feel that Jamie meant business. So he spent lots of time working the head, and he knew how much Scott loved how it made him feel with a hyperactive tongue on his head.

And boy did he ever! He couldn’t help wriggling like a virgin he wasn’t, as if he’d never felt the amazing tonguing Jamie was capable of. It was so hot it was almost torturous. But he had to let Jamie have his revenge, and reel him back into his loving hands; which were, by the way, making good use of fingering his smooth entrance. By the time Jamie had had enough of sucking his naughty brother, Scott was in such a frenzy, he was tempted to screw him himself.

But no, Jamie had to have his way. He bent Scott over so his perfect hairless entrance was gaping wide open at the head of Jamie’s rod. If Jamie didn’t love Scott like he did, he would have just rammed in and fucked him like the little slut he was! But he couldn’t, not to his adorable brother. He cared too much, but he still wanted him to enjoy it. Carefully he eased himself in…

But that made it all the more pleasurable for his brother. By slowly teasing his ass muscles, he had to hold onto Jamie’s shoulders, to stop the screams escaping. He kissed him violently to hold back the noise, and also to let him know he wasn’t in pain; far from it actually. By the time Jamie had completely immersed himself, Scott was panting heavily. He loved it! His brother felt a lot bigger than he looked!

Jamie went for another thrust shortly after. He’d never fucked anyone before, but there was no-one else on Earth he’d want to fuck more than Scott. Just seeing his amazing face light up with ecstasy was enough to make Jamie love him more, and thrust deeper and harder each time. He didn’t speed up, like he loved to be screwed, he knew Scott would like it more if he took more care with each thrust. He bent don’t to kiss him again and disguise the screams. He had him just where he wanted him, on the end of his cock in his warm bed, here to stay with him. Just hearing those words in his mind triggered the start of the most amazing orgasm in the world.

The sensation of his twin’s semen shoot straight into him, coupled with the orgasmic expression he saw in front of him, was the best Scott had ever felt. 16 years had brought a lot to these two, but this was the absolute pinnacle of how good it got, and how strong they both felt about each other. He didn’t care what anyone else would think now, he didn’t want to know about morality, all that mattered was he was with the one person who would only ever love him truly, and would only ever understand what each other had been through. It was after all, all they had.

Jamie collapsed onto the huge chest of his younger sibling. He’d done it, he’d brought Scott right back to where he belonged, and he’d brought the one meaning of his feeble life back to stay. No words were exchanged for a while; they both knew they weren’t needed. What they’d done was enough to convince them both. This was how things were meant to be, and should always have been.

It was well past half an hour after Scott had saved Jamie before they spoke again:
“Scott…”
“Yes?”
“Where did you actually go?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean yesterday night. You never came home”
“Oh…then… Are you sure you want to know?”
“Yes”
“Really?”
“Look, Scott, it doesn’t matter, you’re here now. You’re staying with me, right? After all you said you loved me”
“Yes, yes I did…”
“So tell me!”
“OK…”

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